8 steps to a Happier Life

These suggestions by University of California psychologist Sonya Lyubomirsky are based on research by her and others and featured in a Time Magazine 2005 special on Happiness.

1. Count your blessings
2. Practice acts of kindness
3. Savour life's joys
4. Thank a mentor
5. Learn to forgive
6. Invest time and energy in friends and family
7. Take care of your body
8. Learn to control stress and find ways to deal with hardship



Painting by Patrick Viale with the artist's permission.

What makes us happy - BBC Article

What makes us happy? According to psychologist Professor Ed Diener there is no one key to happiness but a set of ingredients that are vital. For added happiness, look for meaning in your life First, family and friends are crucial - the wider and deeper the relationships with those around you the better. It is even suggested that friendship can ward off germs. Our brains control many of the mechanisms in our bodies which are responsible for disease. Just as stress can trigger ill health, it is thought that friendship and happiness can have a protective effect. According to happiness research, friendship has a much bigger effect on average on happiness than a typical person's income itself. One economist, Professor Oswald at Warwick University, has a formula to work out how much extra cash we would need to make up for not having friends. The answer is £50,000. Marriage also seems to be very important. According to research the effect of marriage adds an average seven years to the life of a man and something like four for a woman. The second vital ingredient is having meaning in life, a belief in something bigger than yourself - from religion, spirituality or a philosophy of life. The third element is having goals embedded in your long term values that you're working for, but also that you find enjoyable. Psychologists argue that we need to find fulfilment through having goals that are interesting to work on and which use our strengths and abilities. Unhappiness However, there are also many things we experience in life that can produce lasting unhappiness. Professor Ed Diener identifies two key events which can have lasting effects. After the loss of a spouse it can take several years to regain the previous level of well-being. The loss of a job can affect a person for years even they are back to work. So if you are born grumpy are you always going to be grumpy? The question of whether we can actually use our knowledge of what makes us happy to lift our levels of happiness permanently is hotly debated by psychologists. According to the positive psychologist Professor Martin Seligman of the University of Pennsylvania it is possible to lift our biological set range of happiness, at least to some extent if we work at it. "The best you can do with positive emotion is you can get people to live at the top of their set range. "So I think you've got about 10 to 15% leverage but you can't take a grouch and make him giggle all the time." The first episode of The Happiness Formula was shown on BBC Two at 1900 BST on Wednesday. E-mail this to a friend Printable version Bookmark with: Delicious Digg reddit Facebook StumbleUpon What are these?

BBC TWO Episode guide Happiness test Take psychologist Professor Ed Diener's test to find out how happy you are Britain's happiness in decline Staying happier for longer Searching the brain for happiness The politics of happiness The science of happiness Happiness is smile shaped Your say: Making Britain happier Your pictures: Tips for happiness In pictures: Happy in Bhutan WATCH ONLINE What is happiness? Think yourself happy Politics of happiness Power of happiness The happiness recipe Happiness in Bhutan RELATED BBC LINKS BBC Two RELATED INTERNET LINKS Professor Ed Diener Professor Andrew Oswald Professor Richard Layard Professor Daniel Kahneman Dr Morten Kringelbach Dylan Evans, Robotics scientist Professor Martin Seligman American Psychological Association Sociologist Professor Linda Waite Professor Robert Putnam World Database of Happiness Centre for Confidence and Well-being The BBC is not responsible for the content of external internet sites MOST POPULAR STORIES NOW MOST SHARED MOST READ Exercise 'risk' for middle aged Dubai stocks drop 6% on new fears Websites start charging for news Phone box has new life as library Fifties pop star Al Alberts dies Most popular now, in detail MOST SHARED MOST READ Dubai stocks drop 6% on new fears Woods hits out at 'false rumours' Exercise 'risk' for middle aged Sexes' danger reactions 'differ' US police 'shot dead in ambush' Swiss voters back ban on minarets What is Dubai and who runs it? What spoiled the party in Dubai? The man who smuggled himself into Auschwitz Phone box has new life as library Most popular now, in detail

Relaxation Techniques - Body Scan

Just as our stress alarm system can be activated by our perception of threatening events we can also learn how to summon up the reverse of this - our relaxation response. Research has shown that there are 7 ways to control our stress response. Breathing is one of them. The body scan is another and it is very simple. The hard bit is deciding to do it.

Many of us are probably familiar with this if we ever tried Yoga or went to a relaxation class. Essentially it consists of systematically focusing on certain body parts and noticing how they feel as we tense and then relax these parts slowly. As you focus systematically on each part of the body you can use your breath to "carry" awareness into each part of the body.

This is a lying down meditation which can help us to get in touch with and get back on friendly terms with our bodies.

I first tried this last year at a relaxation class and I was horrified to realize just how tense and unwell my body felt. I was far too busy and "in my head" to pay attention to my body unless it was as part of a programme - Crazy Type A behaviour perhaps. A day later my GP sent me to A and E for high blood pressure. I think the experience of "checking in" with my body was important as it made me realise what a toll stress was taking on my physical health and was instrumental in getting me to visit my GP.

With all relaxation techniques you should check with your GP before trying some new activity if you are over 30 or have health issues.

The sound of Rain

Gratefulness. Finding a way to "Happiness that doesn't depend on what happens"

Mindfulness

Mindfulness is neither difficult nor complex; remembering to be mindful is the great challenge.
- Christina Feldman

Professor Robert Sapolsky talks on The Uniqueness of Humans

Professor Sapolsky is a leading neuroscientist and the author of "Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers: Organisational Rank and Stress." and "Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers: An Updated Guide to Stress, Stress- Related Diseases and Coping" A fascinating and very readable book. He is a brilliant speaker. He is renowned for his studies on stress and human behaviour and his research with African Baboons and observation of fight or flight responses in zebras. He researches issues of stress and neuron degeneration and was one of the first to document the link between prolonged stress and damage to the neurons in the hippocampus and links between stress and physical and mental disease from a neuroscience and evolutionary perspective.

Described by the New York Times as 'one of the finest natural history writers around' and by Oliver Sacks as ' one of the best science writers of our time'

Robert Sapolsky 'Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers. Organizational Rank and Stress

How and why we turn the stress response on when we don't need to.
How we should learn to live differently and manage our stress responses.

Everything is Going to Be All Right

How should I not be glad to contemplate
the clouds clearing beyond the dormer window
and a high tide reflected on the ceiling?
There will be dying, there will be dying,
but there is no need to go into that.
The lines flow from the hand unbidden
and the hidden source is the watchful heart.
The sun rises in spite of everything
and the far cities are beautiful and bright.
I lie here in a riot of sunlight
watching the day break and the clouds flying.
Everything is going to be all right.

Derek Mahon
Painting by David Tress

I love this poem - it speaks to me of hope and a sense of adventure and the importance of being in the moment in all its complexity. It doesn't deny pain or sadness. Ifind myself thinking of different lines at different times.
I love

The far cities are beautiful and bright

Poetry connects us to what is deepest in ourselves. It gives us access to our own feelings, which are often shadowy, and engages us in the art of making meaning. It widens the space of our inner lives, It is a magical, mysterious inexplicable (though not incomprehensible event)in language.

Edward Hirsch

I think we need to make meaning and that we can find fulfilment when we attend to the 'watchful heart' and make space for our inner lives. I am not sure how much space I give to my inner world. I am pretty sure it is not enough and that I suffer the consequences. Even a few moments of contemplation or 'attending to self' can make a difference.

Do you have poems or lines that give you hope or comfort or inspire or lift you?
Would you consider sharing them?

Stress Management

Stress is a normal physical, mental and emotional reaction to events which we percieve as threatening or overwhelming. It is an adaptive evolutionary response to our environment and can be both positive and negative. Recently almost two thirds of Americans surveyed by the American Psychological Society said that they expected to seek help for stress at some point in their lives.

Positive stress drives us to exert ourselves and push our boundaries.
Negative stress is when we tip over the other side. This sort of stress can be become chronic and has been linked to many of the most prevalent modern diseases such as heart disease and some cancers. Studies suggest that chronic ongoing stress releases hormones into the body that if not dispersed can weaken our immune systems.

The bad news is that much of the way we live today can contribute to raised levels of stress.
The good news is that we can do a great deal to avoid, minimize and manage our stress. There are clinically proven methods of stress reduction which are easy to implement and do not require any elaborate equipment, expense or training.

We just need to believe that being stressed is bad for us and that we can choose to do manage our stress.

First we need to understand just how our stress response works. Once you understand how our stress response gets switched on it becomes easier to see how we can start to learn to switch it off or at least control it

Breathing

The simplest way to relax is to learn to breathe properly. Learn how to control your breathing.

• Sit comfortably or lie down
• Try to adopt an attentive and straight but relaxed posture.
• Now, notice your breath entering and leaving your body.
• Don't judge your breath just notice as you breathe in and out.
• Focus on inhaling and exhaling
• Inhale by slowly taking the air down into your lungs (try to feel the air going down to your diaphragm), hold the breath for a couple of seconds and then gently and slowly exhale.
• Try breathing in and out, counting slowly: IN (one, two, three, four), HOLD (one, two) and OUT (one, two, three, four).
• When you have found the rhythm that suits you and is comfortable, focus on the words 'in' and 'out'. In your mind say, 'In - Out, In - Out, In - Out' in line with your breathing.

As you breathe in imagine the breath recharging or nurturing you. Whatever feels good or makes sense for you.

As you breathe out you may like to imagine yourself relaxing as you let go of tension.

Try to keep thoughts to a minimum by focusing on the breath and your 'In' - 'Out' mantra.

If your busy mind starts to wander don't judge it harshly just notice that that is what the mind tends to do and then gently bring yourself back to observing your breath.

Sometimes I imagine myself like my phone recharging!

Here you can listen to a clinical psychologist explaining the physiological effect of breathing in controlling the stress response and talking about how he uses mindful breathing and meditation to counter anxiety.

It's Good to Laugh

Once again research is proving what we always knew - that laughter is good for us!

Professor Martin Seligman talks about Positive Psychology

Flow

How come if most of us in the developed world have ' never had it so good' it can still seem at times as if we are facing an epidemic of depression and anxiety?

The greatest happiness may come from absorbing oneself in some goal outside oneself and it is possible that one of the reasons for the reported increase in unhappiness in spite of material wealth in some cultures may be that many people are bored and have gained comfort at the price of stimulation.

Professor Mike Csikzentmihalyi has shown through extensive research that when people are engaged in challenging but controllable states that are intrinsically motivating they experience a unique psychological state which he referred to as Flow. This state in which people tyypically 'lose themselves' has been linked to increased psychological and physical well being. These are tasks which require considerable skill and complete concentration so that we become deeply engrossed with the task to the extent that we can lose track of time or of our sense of self or our normal cares and concerns. These activities are satisfying in themselves and research suggests that they are vital to our wellbeing.

We can increase the frequency of our flow experiences by engaging in tasks that challenge our skills to the limits.
How to increase Flow in everyday activites
You can find out more about Flow activities on the positivepsychology website .

7 Steps to Instant Happiness

Be positive
Be Brave
Meditate
Be kind to yourself
Use your pessimism
Find a calling
Act Happy

Are we what we eat?

We accept that how we treat our bodies impacts on our sense of wellbeing and generally we pay lip service to the idea of healthy body = healthy mind. What is the evidence? Can we improve our mood and our thought proccesses by eating better. If this is such a no brainer why do we not pay more attention to the importance of food? Are we all a little bit ADDH from too much caffeine and sugar? The key food issues are quality and quantity. The What How and Why of our complex relationship with food.

Are there super mood foods?

'The really important research question in health is why we crave carbohydrates when we feel unloved?' Robert Sapolsky author of "Why Zebras don't get Ulcers".


Neuroscience developments suggest that eating certain foods ... aids neurogenesis